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Central Standard

Playing The Dozens: A History Of Rap's Mama

On this Tuesday's Central Standard, a look at a tradition of African American verbal combat and insults that’s ruled neighborhoods and childhoods long before rap. At the heart of this tradition? 'Yo Mama jokes.

Join us as we play the dozens with author Elijah Wald. He's written a history of the street insult game that has inspired artists from Jelly Roll Morton to Zora Neale Hurston to NWA.

Elijah Wald, The Dozens



- Your mama's so old she knew Basie before he could Count (our guest Elijah Wald, The Dozens)

- Yo mama's so poor, someone threw a cigarette in her yard & she said, “Clap yr hands, stomp your feet, thank the lord, we got heat!" (Listener April)

- Yo mama so ugly that not even goldfish crackers smile back. (@diebeatus)

- Yo mama's so fat, she jumped in the air and got stuck. (@UrbanHarpnBowl)

- 'Yo Mama's so stupid, 'yo mama's a mess, she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death! (Caller Rick in Wyandotte)

- Ur mamma's armpits r so hairy it looks like she has buckwheat in a headlock. (@dgrindhouse_ent)

- Yo mama's so old, I told her to act her own age and she died. (@diebeatus)

- Yo momma so ugly her parents had to tie a steak around her neck just to get the dog to play with her. (Listener Todd on FB)

- Yo mama's so stupid...she got locked in a furniture store and slept on the floor! (Listener Isaac)

- Yo mama's so dumb, she drank Kool-Aid to get a Bluetooth (@UrbanHarpnBowl)

- Yo mamma so old she sat next to Moses in homeroom. (@dgrindhouse_ent)

- Yo mama's so dirty, I stopped by the house and there were 4 cockroaches singing "We are Family" in the kitchen. (@MARKSURMA)

- You're mama's such a ho, they took her to a farm and dug an entire field with her before they realized it was her. (Elijah Wald)

- Yo mama's soo fat, she wears a VCR like a beeper. (@UrbanHarpnBowl)

- Yo mama is so old her social security number is 1. (Tracy in KCMO)

- Yo mama's so fat she put on her lipstick with a paint roller. (@UMightBeGhetto)

- Yo mama's so stupid, if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless. (@UMightBeGhetto)

- 'Yo momma is so stupid, she thought Taco Bell was a Mexican phone company. (Jabulani @kcurCST)

- Yo mama is so old Moses is in her yearbook. (Jabulani @kcurCST)

- Yo' mama's so fat all her relationships are long distance. (Andrea @kcurCST)

- Your mama's so dumb, when she asked me what kind of jeans I was wearing and I said "Guess," she said, "Are they Levi's?" (Jabulani @kcurCST)

And the winners of our battle...