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Panel Round Two

BILL KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT... DON’T TELL ME, the NPR news quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. We are playing this week with Faith Salie, Adam Burke and Alonzo Bodden. And here again is your host at the Chase Bank Auditorium in downtown Chicago, Peter Sagal.

PETER SAGAL, HOST:

Thank you, Bill.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: In just a minute, Bill announces his pick for vice president, Carly Fiorhyma (ph). It's our Listener Limerick Challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT - that's 1-888-924-8924.

Right now panel, some more questions for you from the week's news. Adam, Thursday was take your son and/or daughter to work day. And we at NPR are just as enthusiastic about it as everybody else pretends to be. And in fact, during take your kid to work day, a young visitor to NPR HQ did what?

(LAUGHTER)

ADAM BURKE: Goosed Terry Gross?

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: No, but that would be hilarious. It'd be like - Terry would be like oh, well, why did you goose me? Tell me about that.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Was there something...

BURKE: Peed in a tote bag.

SAGAL: No. Well, you know how kids - and it's kind of - you could've seen this coming because you know how kids like to push buttons?

BURKE: Oh, turned off the stations?

SAGAL: Yes.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL, LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: NPR went off the air for about a full minute...

FAITH SALIE: Oh my gosh.

SAGAL: ...Because of some kid at take your kid to work day. You may have thought - now, you may have thought this minute of silence was just one of Ira Glasses' really, really long pauses.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: But no, it was dead air. Apparently, a child of an unnamed NPR staffer...

SALIE: Negligent Parental Radio...

BURKE: (Laughter) Nice.

SAGAL: ...Reached out and pushed a button or a series of buttons that they should not have. The worst part - that minute of silence beat this show in the ratings.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Adam, many cities have problems with people texting while walking, not paying attention to traffic signals, sometimes even walking into traffic. One German city is taking action. How?

BURKE: Like, text lanes, like a bike lane...

SAGAL: No, they've tried that. But the problem is that the people just walk right off the text lane right into traffic, get hit by cars and cause accidents.

BURKE: Now, you say problem. I say...

(LAUGHTER)

BURKE: I say solution.

(APPLAUSE)

SALIE: What direction are they looking?

BURKE: Down. Oh, so the lights are going to be on the ground.

SAGAL: Yes, they're putting traffic lights in the sidewalk.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: This is to prevent what is called distracted walking or natural selection.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: This town in Germany is embedding traffic lights in the sidewalk, alerting downward-facing pedestrians - yoga pose - that their approaching an intersection. It's amazing 'cause one of the first things you learn when you're a kid is, right, look both ways before you cross the street. Phones have made us dumber than we were at the age of 3.

(LAUGHTER)

ALONZO BODDEN: Can't they just get the alligators from...

(LAUGHTER)

BODDEN: ...The Olympics and send them over to Germany? Solve two problems at once.

SAGAL: But people - you know what it's like with people. I know what it's like with people because I'm one of them. They're too distracted by their phones. You'd be, like, texting somebody...

BODDEN: Oh, you'll wake up when there's an alligator in front of you...

SAGAL: Really?

(LAUGHTER)

BODDEN: ...Or not.

SAGAL: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Adam, time for a new game we're calling...

KURTIS: You Know What? Don't Answer That.

SAGAL: So we're going to ask you a question, Adam. We really don't want to hear the answer.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: So we'll give you a point if you simply refuse to answer the question.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: You ready?

BURKE: Sure...

SAGAL: All right.

BURKE: ...I think.

SAGAL: Here's a question - and again, we don't want you to answer.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: After a number of incidents, swimming pools in Iceland have placed signs advising swimmers not to use the hairdryers in the men's rooms to do what?

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Remember, you only get a point if you refuse to answer on principle.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: Can he resist?

BURKE: I mean...

(LAUGHTER)

BURKE: I mean, I feel like this question has already been answered.

(LAUGHTER)

BURKE: You know, I'd rather not answer that.

SAGAL: All right, you get a point.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

SAGAL: And we appreciate you not saying it.

(APPLAUSE)

SAGAL: The signs in these bathrooms in Iceland in the locker rooms - this is a phrase I think we all need to know in Icelandic - (speaking Icelandic) - or this is not a scrotum dryer.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: There's a remarkable illustration going with - to go with it showing what they're talking about. It looks like a very happy dancing man about the make himself even happier.

(LAUGHTER)

BURKE: Also, think about how much easier it would be to draw your scrotum if you had a removable wanker.

(LAUGHTER)

SAGAL: You just take it off, do it through that Dyson Airblade, you're all set to go.

(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "GREAT BALLS OF FIRE")

JERRY LEE LEWIS: (Singing) You shake my nerves and you rattle my brain. Too much love drives a man insane. You broke my will but what a thrill. Goodness gracious, great balls of fire. I laughed at love 'cause I thought it was funny... Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.

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